Christmas Carols a la Rosie

Rosie innocently sings her own versions of popular Christmas songs:

"Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way.  Know what's fun?  It is to ride..."

"Shrek the halls with boughs of holly..."

And my personal favorite, a verse of "We Wish You a Merry Christmas":
"Oh, bring us some piggy pudding..."

WELL then!

This morning I dressed Zack, then I dressed Rosie, and then I (still in my pajamas) sat on my bed to fold some laundry.  Rosie lay on the bed watching me, and after a time she said to me with no particular expression, "Mommy, you need to take a shower; you're dirty."

No joke, she said this

It was time to make cookies, and Rosie wanted to help.  Whenever she helps in the kitchen, she always needs to stand on "her" stepstool, which she likes to drag all over the kitchen to reach whatever she "needs" at the time, scissors lately.  Today, though, she had a problem.

Rosie: "Ri, I need you to get my stool."
Maria: "Where is it?"
Rosie: "Up there [indicates the stool now hanging up high on two hooks attached to the cabinet].  Daddy put it up there so I can't get it."
Maria: "That's a smart Daddy."
Rosie: "Yeah, he's smarter than I thought."

And now, Zacky said!

Rosie was dawdling about putting her things away, so I started to count to her, "One....."  Zack immediately followed up with, "Two, three!"

More blame shifting

Rosie colored the face of her Mr. Incredible doll.  When I saw, I told her to go show her father, who asked her what happened.

Her response: "I don't know!  Someone must have markered him!"

Tech support

Rosie was playing with her grandfather's iPad.  She managed to get into the stage where you can move the apps around on the screen.  When this happens, the icons of the apps "wiggle."  Rosie didn't know how to undo this, so she called for her grandfather, saying, "Pop, we have a situation here!"

My rant

I definitely just spent the last 45 minutes cutting, folding, and gluing this:

It's a rainbow wand from "Jake and the Never Land Pirates."  I'll be shocked if it lasts until the end of the day.  In fact, I'm pretty sure the only reason she hasn't come running in her screaming that it ripped is because her brother is napping.  Thank you, Disney Junior.

Rosie wants to play on the Disney Junior website all day, every day (we don't let her, of course).  But every time she does play on the website, she prints at least one thing.  So here is my suggestion to Disney Junior: Forget sweepstakes where you can win a toy or a DVD or anything fun like that.  I want a sweepstakes where the prize is a year's supply of paper and color ink cartridges.

Also, does the "Jake" theme song *have* to loop over and over and over again???

Just my humble thoughts.

Vivid imagination

We were driving to the dentist's office for Rosie's appointment, and we hit a little bit of traffic.  Rosie said, "Mommy, can you make the car have wings so it can fly like a plane?"  I answered, "Wouldn't that be nice?  It doesn't work that way, though."  Rosie replied, "Maybe Daddy can get some new batteries and then the car can fly."

Again, I wish.

Blame Shifting

Little brother rolled the dog food bin into the living room.  There was about a cup-full left, and Rosie dumped it all onto the floor.  When I walked into the room, I gasped and asked Rosie, "Have you lost your mind???"

She frowned and said, "No, Zacky lost his mind."

Poor Daddy

Rosie had polka dots on her shirt and polka dots on her pants, and she was blabbering about polka dots, so I said, "Rosie, YOU are a polka dot!"  She thought this was hysterical.  Her brother was wearing stripes, so she told him, "Zacky, you're a stripe!"  Her Hello Kitty stuffed animal wears a striped shirt, so Rosie then said, "Hello Kitty is a stripe!"

Rosie's father overheard this conversation, and he said, "Hey, Rosie, what am I?"

Her answer: "Oh, Daddy, you're just an old man."

Alliteration Affliction

My Rosiegirl sucks on her finger... when she's sleeping, watching t.v., or riding in the car.

One day when we were riding in the car, I noticed that she was sucking her finger again.  Since the "diaper fairies" were successful in helping with potty-training, I thought maybe I could introduce her to the idea of "finger fairies."  So I said to her, "Rosie, what do you think the finger fairies would say if they saw you sucking on your finger?"

Except I had some trouble with all the "f's" in that sentence, and I didn't end up saying "sucking."

Cold Feet

Rosie and I were sitting on the floor in her room.  She had just had a bath and put on her pajamas and was sitting in my lap while I dried her hair with a hair dryer.  I felt something on my foot, and I thought she was trying to take off my sock.  Then I felt something in my other sock too, so I looked down.  I guess her little feet were cold, because she put them in my socks!  No matter that my feet were still in them.

Little evangelist

On Sunday we were going to a social after church, and we told Rosie she could come with us for the "church party."  She was very excited to go, and she began to gather several of her treasures du jour to take with her in her tin lunchbox, which she fancies a purse.  She had some things lined up on her dresser, including a play lipstick and a little play milk carton, and she was talking to them, almost like she was giving them a pep talk.  She said to them, "Okay, Makeup.  Okay, Milk.  Are you ready for your first Church?"

If It Looks Like a Duck...

Yes, that is my child kneeling on the deck railing with her head in the butterfly bush.  You may be tempted to ask, "Rosie, why are you in the butterfly bush?"  The answer is quite simple:

She wanted to catch the butterfly.

Sums it all up

My father was watching a pre-season football game on television, and Rosie noticed.  She asked him what he was watching, and he told her it was football.  Rosie is not very familiar with football, so she stood there and watched it for a moment.  As with everything, she added her observation:

"They're running!  And they're falling down!"

Clever girl

Occasionally I have a brilliant idea.

Rosie has always been a great sleeper, but since she's been potty-trained, she's been coming into our room in the middle of the night, bringing her pillow (and her various accoutrements du jour, like drawings, Hello Kitty, books, plastic tea cups, etc.), and sleeping in our bed.  This is a problem that I decided to nip in the bud, especially since her feet usually end up in her father's face (while her head is next to mine...??).

My brilliant idea was to start a sleep chart for her.  I created a grid, printed it out, and taped it to the side of her bookshelf.  I told her that every night she slept in her bed all night long, she would get a sticker on her chart.  When she fills up a row on her chart, she will get a little "special prize," and if she fills up the whole chart, she will get a big "special prize."

She is so excited about this chart!  The first thing she says in the morning is that she needs a sticker on her chart because she slept in her bed all night long.  There have only been two nights since we started that she slept in our room, and one of them was due to a severe thunderstorm, for which I had pity on her.

Unfortunately, my brilliance was dimmed by the fact that I let Rosie see that I put the sheet of stickers on top of the dresser in the hallway.  One day Rosie's doll crib was in the hallway next to the dresser, and Rosie was sitting in her room "playing with stickers."  She used the doll crib to reach the top of the dresser, grabbed the stickers we use for her chart, and began filling up her chart with stickers.

At least we know she's resourceful.

Why My Girl Sleeps in the Dark

As I was putting Rosie to bed last night, I reached over to turn on her night light, and Rosie shouted, "No!  I don't want that one!"  I told her she had to have that one because her desk lamp was too bright (which usually leads to her staying up coloring for several hours).  She told me that she didn't want any light.  I confirmed with her, "So, you don't want any lights on at all?  You want to sleep in the dark."  She said yeah, and I asked her why.

"There are eye gonks."

???

"Eye gonks."

So I ask her, "Can you show me where the eye gonks are?"  She points at her dresser.  The light from her night light reflects off the dresser and, I guess to her, looks like glowing eyes.

De Colores

My sister has dated a tall, bald man from India.  Rosie refers to him as Carlos.

While we were out today, Rosie was walking with my sister and said, "Look, there's your husband!"  My sister, not being married, asked Rosie what she was talking about.  Rosie indicated a tall, dark-skinned, bald man crossing the street and said, "He looks like Carlos.  Mom, that brown man looks like Carlos!"

An important situation

We have found counting to three to be a very effective method for motivating Rosie.  Before we get to three, she usually has started moving; she really doesn't even like when we start counting and will often say, "Don't count to me!"

One night Rosie was upstairs drawing, and it was time for bed.  Her father called up to her that it was bedtime, and she responded with something about how she was busy drawing.  He told her that he was going to start counting, and she started to get frustrated.  And then he started counting: "One.... two...."  And Rosie responded...

"Stop DOING that!!!  This is SERIOUS!!!"

And so it begins

Rosie has taken to wandering into our room at night and climbing into bed with us.  In the morning, I asked her why she was in our bed, and she said, "It's nice and cozy!"  Then I asked her what was wrong with her bed.

Her response: "It's dumb."

Still a good big sister

Our attic is finished, but there is a storage area that is long, narrow, and has a low ceiling, making it very dark.  Little Brother likes to walk in and out of this space.  One day, he started to walk back there, and Rosie saw him.  She froze and shrieked, "No, Zacky, it's scary back there!"

Gotta work off those fruit flies

Rosie and her daddy discovered a spiderweb on the deck.  He pointed out the spider to Rosie and said, "Rosie, look at the spider running across the web!"  Rosie, in her usual tippy-toe excitement, exclaimed, "Yeah, she's exercising!"

Everyone's a Critic

My sister pointed out a painting to Rosie and told her that Rosie's great-grandmother had painted it.  She asked Rosie, "Isn't it a pretty painting?"

Her response: "Not yet."

New article of clothing

We were in Rosie's room, and she happened upon her Ariel doll, who was wearing her fins but had nothing on her top half.  Rosie frowned and said, "Uh-oh.  She needs her ninny-fitters."  Her daddy, who was more composed than I, said, "Oh, the seashells that fit on her ninnies?"  "Yeah, those ones."

Motivation

Rosie climbed into her brother's playpen one day and was shrieking and laughing about how she was in there.  Then she got tired of being in there and tried to climb out, but she didn't think she could.  She asked both her father and me to help her out, but we both tried to encourage her to climb out herself.

Then she dropped her beloved Hello Kitty outside of the playpen and said, "Oh, no!  Hello Kitty!" and hopped right out.

Magic trick

When we moved, we brought most of our things to the new house, but some of the kids' toys were still at the old house.  Rosie referenced something that was still in the old house, and my mother asked her what happened to the old house.

Her answer: "It disappeared."

Things that happen while the Rosiegirl is left unattended

When I came out of the shower, she was sitting on my bed painting her toenails.  She actually didn't do a bad job...

His style

Zack's hair was looking particularly wild after he woke up one morning.  When Rosie saw him at the breakfast table, she said, "Mom, Zacky's hair is grumpy!"

Cinderella

It's getting to be about twilight, and we are in the car driving home. Rosie has been occupied with drawing in her colorin book, but she looks up says, "We'd better get home to the big house. It's getting late."

There are lots of Poppies and lots of Grandmoms!

Rosie has two grandmothers and one great-grandmother who are living.  My grandmother called on the phone, and my husband answered, saying, "Hi, Grandmom."  Rosie overheard this and asked, "What kind of Grandmom is it?"

I know two children

A lot of times when it's time for bed or dinner or whatever, I'll say to the kids, "I know two children who need [to go to bed, to eat dinner, etc.]"  This morning they were in their pajamas, and Rosie came over to me and said, "I know two children who need some clothes!"

Jingle Bell

Rosie's first experience with a cake pop went as follows...

After dinner, Rosie asked for her "special treat," which was a cake pop.  She thought it looked like a bell, so she held the stick with the cake end in the air and shook it like a bell, singing, "Jingle, jingle, jingle, jingle..." repeatedly.  We warned her that this was not a good idea.

Of course, as she was shaking the cake pop, the cake end flew across the room.  Rosie stared after it with an astonished look on her face.  When her father said, "Uh-oh, Rosie, what happened?" she answered, "I jingled it!"

Good job

Rosie likes to watch a show on Netflix on her grandfather's phone, but that's the only place she's ever watched it.  This morning when my husband put the same show on for her at our house, Rosie told him, "Great thinking to put on 'Color Crew,' Dad!"

Cheesy

When Rosie went to the dentist, she got a goodie bag with toothpaste and a toothbrush in it.  She was so excited about these "gifts."  The next day when it was time to brush her teeth, I opened her regular toothpaste, but she said, "Not that one!  I want the cheese one!"  The cheese one?  Oh, right.  Her new toothpaste from the dentist has Sponge Bob on it.  She thought he was cheese.

Right back at ya!

I could hear that Rosie was starting to get into something she probably shouldn't be into, so I cautioned her, "Don't be naughty..."

She answered, "Don't be naughty either..."

Good big sister, part 4

Rosie and I were in the kitchen making dinner, and Zack started to fuss in the living room.  Rosie stopped what she was doing, said, "Oh, no.  I think Zack's crying," and ran into the living room singing "You Are My Sunshine."

Another country heard from

We were all in the car, and my husband and I were have a discussion about the quality of products made in China versus elsewhere.  From the backseat, Rosie shouts, "We don't say Chinas in the car!"

Song of the Day, 6 April 2012

Rosie's been singing this all day.  I'll bet you didn't know these are the lyrics:

"Baa, baa, black sheep, February wool.  Yes sir, yes sir, three bags full."

It's a race!

During our evening walk, my husband had Zack in the stroller on one side of the street, and I had Rosie by the hand on the other side.  My husband shouted, "Hey, Rosie, I'll race you!" and started running.  Rosie yelled back, "No, Daddy!  Don't erase me!!"

Backseat driver

We were all in the car, my husband driving.  He accelerated enough to make the engine rev, and Rosie said, "Daddy, slow down a little!"

Double entendre, much?

Rosie has two little figures, one of Jessie the Cowgirl, and the other of Mr. Incredible.  She's walking around hitting them together, and she said, "Jessie and Mr. Incredible are banging!"

Dear Rosie

Dear Rosie,
Why have you forsaken nap time?  This is the third day in a row that you have played in your room instead of taking a nap.  I don't like you when you don't get a nap!  You are extra grouchy, and you grunt at me a lot.  Please take a nap.

Love,
Momma

True story

We sat down for lunch today, we said grace, then Rosie said, "So, Mom... would you like to take me back to Disney World?"

My face talks

Rosie asked if she could watch a movie.  I shook my head no, and she said, "Mommy, don't say that with your face!"

Glean from this what you will

We made a Pandora station for Rosie based on her Ariel song, and every now and then, pretty infrequently, there is a brief commercial.  Now Rosie runs around randomly saying, "Where there's Pepsi, there's music!"

Brings a tear

I heard Rosie singing to the tune of "Are You Sleeping?":
Mommy Sarah, Mommy Sarah, she loves me!

And then she said, "Mommy, are you my best friend?"

Good big sister, part 3

In almost three years of being a mother, I have learned a few things.  One thing I've learned is that sometimes you just *know.*  That's how I was able to record on video the incidents preceding the following conversation:

Me: Rosie, you did several naughty things just now.  Number one, you woke up your brother.
Rosie: We were having fun in there!
Me: Yes, but he was sleeping, and you woke him up.  You're not supposed to do that.  Number two, you were in his crib.  Are you a baby?
Rosie: Yes!
Me: No,  you are not a baby.
Rosie: No, I'm a girl!
Me: That's right, you're a big girl.  Cribs are not for big girls.
Rosie: They're for babies!
Me: That's right, and that's why you aren't supposed to climb in there with Baby Zack.  Number three, you took your brother's clothes off.  You are not supposed to take his clothes off.  That's Mommy's job.  Your job is to do what Mommy tells you, and right now, Mommy is telling you to get back in your bed and take a nap!

Good big sister, part 2

Sometimes her brother bothers her.  One day when this was the case, she sang, "Rain, rain, Zack go away!"

Weather

It's a little chilly today, but Rosie exchanged her warm clothes for shorts and a tank top.  She was lounging around the house like that, and I said, "Rosie, aren't you cold?"

Her response: "No, I'm just breezy."

Why she won't eat pickles

My Rosiegirl is a very picky eater, and it's very difficult to get her to try new foods.  If you ask her if she likes something that she just tried for the first time, she'll probably tell you she does, but she doesn't mean it.  She only really means that she likes something when she tells you without any prompting.  She also really likes to lick her food rather than bite it. 

For lunch today, I thought we'd try pickles.  Actually, Zack pulled the jar out of the refrigerator, and I said, "Hey, why not?"  So I put a couple of bread and butter slices in a condiment cup next to Rosie's plate, and I suggested she might like to try one.  She tentatively picked one up and said, "I don't like pickles."  I told her maybe she could just smell it.  So she did.  She deemed it worthy to lick, so she commenced with the licking.  In between licks, she said, "It's goody-good-good!"  That means she actually likes it.

And then she stopped.  She examined the pickle slice.  "Mom, it's got little nuts in it."  (nuts = seeds)  I told her that it was okay and that since these "nuts" are so tiny it's okay to eat them and they won't hurt her.  Nope.  "Mom, I can't eat the nuts.  Can you take them out?"  Um, well, no.  Then there won't be much pickle left.

So she put the pickle back in the cup and said, "I don't like pickles."

Her idea of sharing

She definitely said to her brother this morning, "Zacky, can I help you eat your pretzels?"

As long as you're having fun...

This afternoon, Rosie dumped an entire 2 oz. (picture two shotglasses full) bottle of glitter onto the floor and in the laundry basket (which, might I add, was full of clean clothes).  When I asked her why she would do that, she rubbed her hands in the pile of glitter on the carpet and said, "I'm having fun in here!"

So if anyone has any brilliant ideas on how to remove glitter from two toddlers, I would be much obliged.

Progress?

I definitely just heard her say, "Sorry, diapers.  I'm sorry.  We have to go to preschool."

Sorry to disappoint

As is her custom, when Rosie woke up this morning, she stood at the top of the steps bellowing, "Mooooooooommmy!"  Today her father was the first to arrive on the scene, and when Rosie saw him, she said, "Oh, it's you."

Parrot

Rosie wanted me to put batteries in the walkie talkies, and I told her we didn't have any (which may have been slight fabrication on my part, but she doesn't know this).

She said, "What am I gonna do with you?"

Duh

Rosie was wearing one of her new dresses, and Poppy told her, "That's a pretty dress, Rosie, where did you get it?"

Her answer: "On the hanger."

If it looks like a duck...

Bright and early this morning (well, not bright, because the sun was not up yet), I heard the stirrings of my children, so I got up and started making a bottle.  Rosie came to the gate at the top of the stairs and began a series of shrieks, so from the kitchen I called up to her, "Rosie, no shrieking."  Then she went into Zack's room and told him, "Zack, that sounds like Mommy!!!"

We've come so far...

My brother asked Rosie what she wanted to be when she grows up.  She didn't really understand, so I asked her if she might like to be a nurse like her aunt or a teacher like Mommy.  She said no.  My brother asked her if she would like to be a meteorologist like he is (because she definitely knows what that is, right?).

As if the answer were clearly obvious, Rosie told us, "No, I'm gonna be a princess."  I guess she won't be campaigning for women's rights anytime soon.

Not one to be left out

I was changing Zack's diaper while Rosie was in the other room.  I was making faces at him, and he was laughing up a storm.  Rosie heard us laughing together, so she came into the room and asked, "What's so funny in here?"

Super Why drawings

An artist I am not.  I know this.  My daughter does not.  She was sitting on my lap, happily scribbling on a notepad with a pen.  And then she says, "Mommy, can you draw Super Why?"

I immediately thought, "No, I do not possess that capability, so the answer is 'No.  I cannot.'"  Yeah, tell that to a two-year-old.  So I told her I would try.  I scribbled something that remotely resembled a human (which is interesting, because I'm not so sure Super Why is actually human.  I mean, he flies his Why Flyer into a book to change the ending.  Alas, I digress).

Naturally, that was not sufficient for her.  Next, "Now do Wonder Red!"  Really???  Okay, fine.

"And Alpha Pig?"  Now a pig?  Ugh.

"And the Why Flyers?"  Yeah, right.  Okay, I'll draw one.

"And the other ones?"  Yeah, I'm done..... "Hey, Rosie, isn't that Curious George on the television?"

 The End.

Dear Rosie

Dear Rosie,
Thank you for taking 70 - that's right, 70! - blurry pictures of your toys/the floor/nothing with my camera phone.  It won't take me long at all to delete them (not!).

Love,
Momma